Out with the old.........in with the new and all that!!!

Another year has passed us by and I have also realised it is over three months since I last wrote a blog post, that is bad but in a positive way I have been really busy setting up my new business!

This year has been a roller coaster and didn't end well when I lost my wonderful nan in October, but having been ill for a few years now it is what she wanted, to be at peace.......The year started off well, my birthday is in January so always a great way to start the year (more pressies!!),  but then BANG 01 February you get told you are being made redundant, then we celebrated Sidney's 2nd birthday with family in February and in May went out to Italy to be a bridesmaid and to celebrate one of my besties wedding in beautiful Tuscany which was perfect.......but I spent 6 months worrying about what we will do about money, what job will I do, shall I retrain, but what? questions questions questions going on my head and then when I finally finished work I had no clue what I was going to do, I felt totally lost and at the same time worrying about money but then I had this light bulb moment, lets do what I wanted to do a few years ago and open an on line shop selling fun, individual and funky kids wear, I have some money and time to do it so yes that is what I am going to be launching in February 2014!!

 I cannot tell you how excited I am to be doing this, I have worked so hard to set up this business and so looking forward to the New Year. I am a strong believer that things like this happen for a reason and I have proved to myself that this can happen if you put your mind to it!

I will leave you with a few of my New Year resolutions I have put together for 2014 but if you want to hear more details about when I will be launching my business you can follow me on Twitter @sidneyboo1 or visit my website once I have launched at www.sidneyboo.co.uk

1) Eat less food - I am seriously going to work hard to shift these lbs and eat better food and smaller portions!!
2) Be a calmer mother - I need to remember that my son is still only little and so I must not get wound up as much about silly little things!
3) Sleep more - I go to bed far too late most nights and must go to bed earlier at least 3 nights a week so I don't feel or look like a knackered old woman everyday!
4) Be nicer to Darren - when I am tired he gets the brunt of it so hopefully with a bit more sleep I may be less of a bitch!!!!
5) Less time on my phone - I spend way too much time on my phone, I don't even realise sometimes so that is going to change big time!

I wish you all a Happy New Year!

Click here to see some clips of the fun times in 2013!

Plan in action!

I'm setting up a business...there I said it....makes it feel real now!

When I was on maternity leave (2 years ago now!) I had all these different business ideas in my head, for those of you that know me very well, will know my other half has a head like that as well, so may be I caught it off him! I worked really hard and made loads of notes, everything to avoid going back to work to sit at a desk. Don't get me wrong I loved my job but I really thought at the time a "full time" mum was for me but I needed money and my own business will give me something to get by. It never happened in time and so off I trotted to work, but I actually enjoyed working and the balance worked well so I never pursued my ideas. I had a manager who was really supportive and we worked out part time hours that suited me and the business. I felt like Sarah again! Then this happened "redundancy". I felt a bit lost when I heard and had all these job ideas and even thought about retraining, I guess that is part of the process you go through when your faced with redundancy.

I finished work at end of July and knowing that a "full time" mum is not for me, as much as I love my son I need to do something else in addition to parenting. I don't think people realise how hard being a parent is until you are one, I know I wasn't prepared for it and still feel lost most some days. I am not trying to avoid being a parent at all, if anything doing this will allow me to spend more time with my son, he will always come first no matter what. I just need something else in my life, a challenge, other than his tantrums!

So the story is I am setting up a business, an online business, yep you've guessed it baby & child related! I know there is competition out there, I have done my research, but there is room for all of us out there......right??  It is still early days yet but I have done the initial work and going to my first trade exhibition very soon!

For now watch this space!!

P.S Any tips or advice from other mums or dads who work for themselves to fit round their children, will be very much appreciated!

Stir crazy!

It has been 3 weeks since I finished work, I can't say I have noticed or feel sad that I left as I was only in the office 1 day a week towards the end but I have to admit that I miss working, like really miss it. I miss using my brain, well what was left after having Sidney, I miss the office conversations. I miss the calmness, work was less crazy even if it didn't seem like it at times, the commute was an occasional nightmare when I was in the office but at the moment I am struggling, I am tired and drained. I don't feel bad for saying this as I am being honest but Sidney is breaking me, okay its not just him, this whole stay at home mum thing and most of the time Sid is happy, lovely, just full of character and I absolutely adore him but its the whining and the tantrums I am having day in day out with him, teething isn't helping (yep the four bastard back teeth that take forever!) and I know I am not alone in feeling like this and that this is completely normal behaviour for a 2.5 year old and some people just get on with it but it is so much more worse since I have been off work,  may be he his pushing me to go back to work as he likes the break with Nannie!

When I was on maternity leave I wanted to be a full time mum, I wanted redundancy then but it never happened and so I went back to work part time, because financially I had to if I wanted to buy myself things, have holidays and meals out etc. So I went to work and slipped straight back in to my role. I loved working again and I looked forward to spending those days I had off with Sidney. It is true what people say, that you appreciate them more, of course I did before I went back and I still do now I have finished, but even more so when I had that time apart from him. I think he did as well. I loved  it when I came home from work and I see his little face light up when he first sees me!

I have been looking for part time work, I am not ready for full time plus childcare costs are not cheap, we have one day covered with the in laws but I don't earn a massive amount to justify the difference for the other 4 days, and I enjoy the one or two days a week with just me and Sid. I have something exciting in the pipeline that I am working on at the moment which I am hoping will take off very soon and all will be revealed shortly but for now I am looking for a job a few days a week to give me some pocket money (basically shoes and clothes money!) and most importantly so I don't feel like I am going doolally!!

I believe that Happy Mummy = Happy Baby and I am trying not to forget that!

Home Sweet Home

For a while now we have been contemplating a move to the countryside, okay we are not far from the countryside where we are now in lovely Horsham, West Sussex. In fact we only have to get in to our car and drive for 5 minutes and we can walk around woodlands and look out at rolling hills, but we have been thinking about moving to Somerset.

We went to Somerset for a weekend about 4 years ago and fell in love with the place. We have no family ties there, though my best friend lives near there so that would be a massive positive, but also feel it would be lovely for Sidney to grow up in the area and also the main reason would be that we could afford a bigger house. However this move would come with big sacrifices, family being the main one. We used to live in a town in Surrey and at the time where we live now was cheaper and decided a change would be good. We are glad we made the move, its not far away, but the town we live in now has much more shops and facilities than where we lived before and Horsham is a great place for families, but we need want more space and just cannot afford the next move up on the property ladder since I went back part time and not working at all now!

I know we are lucky to have a nice home in a nice area but there is nothing wrong with wanting more???  I feel in two minds, I want a bigger house (we are bursting at the seams here) and would love to live near my best friend and may be even get a dog! I know I will make friends, I have made most of my friends in Horsham from having Sidney, just by meeting other parents in the area, and a few of these will be friends for life, so I know I will meet other parents from nursery, schools, clubs etc etc, its much easier to meet new people when you have a child.......but I feel like I have a life here now and I am scared to rock it,  my family life was rocked when I was kid and I don't want Sidney to feel like I did, I want him to feel secure and have family around him.

Feed back from friends who don't have families nearby say don't do it unless you really have to so I am struggling to make a decision, we would probably rent for 6 months to test the water just in case we think we have made a massive mistake but I then feel guilty for upsetting Sidney even more. I know I know kids are adaptable and this is probably a good age to do it, rather than when they are slightly older but do I bite the bullet and just do it or make some changes here to look at moving locally in the near future, or is this just me using Sidney as a excuse may be I need the security that I lost for part of my childhood, I should know but I really don't.

I am a strong believer that things happen for a reason so whatever we decide will be but it's not just mine and Darren's life, we also have to think of this little persons life and taking him away from his friends and most importantly family!

I will keep you posted but for now I will continue to scroll the Rightmove web pages until we make that decision!

Scared but a fresh start is what is needed

Back in February this year I found out the company I work at had proposed that my job will be eliminated so there was the possibility I would face redundancy, I knew then it was definite, and from working in my role in Projects, I know that these proposals have been worked on for a long time so I was expecting the worst. In May I was told it was definite and I would start my 12 weeks notice period. There were opportunities for me elsewhere within the company should I decide to go for them, but I have been with the company for over 15 years and knew this is the time for a fresh start!......plus the journey to work and parking there is bit of a bitch!

I am scared, shit scared (excuse the language - but this is exactly how I feel at the moment) I worry about money as it is and how am I going to get a part time job to fit in with childcare without unsettling Sidney?????However......I am also really excited, especially now I have had a long time to process it, there are so many things and jobs I have planned to do but never pursued as there has never been the right moment. I faced redundancy a few years ago but got a job within the company doing what I do now,  then I dreamt of being made redundant when I was on maternity leave a couple of years ago, which never happened,  but now this is real and its really happening.......Don't get me wrong I actually like my job and am going to miss the friends I have made over the years, some very close friends, but I know I will always see them again but I will miss what I do.

What is next??.....I don't know, I have secured a small job for now, which is flexible hours and will give me a bit of pocket money and could lead to something else, but I also have other ideas like setting up a on line business, doing a course and updating this blog more frequently!!!......These things will take a while to do and set up, so for now I am going to enjoy the time off with Sidney and who knows what will come up on the way!

Sleeping prince

One of my special moments of the day is watching my baby boy sleeping...No, I don't mean I love it when he is asleep, ok a little but when you have bathed, fed and put to bed with a little story and then just before you go to bed yourself you go and check on them and watch them sleeping...it's beautiful and I really treasure it....I sit and wonder what his he is dreaming about or is he thinking about his day and what he got up to!

Piggy oink oink

Do you ever get those days when you can't stop eating? Well today has been
One of those days and I just want to eat and eat!

I have now managed to stop the food entering my mouth and sipping a cup of tea, using rice dream, it's like a milk but it's certainly not a dream!.... And I have managed to avoid the biscuits with my tea, which is always a bonus!

I do however feel fat and bloated and plan to go to gym tomorrow to burn it off but I am never that optamistic about my gym plans, and seeing that I haven't been for the last 3 weeks I don't think it looks promising. I need to get my butt in gear and go before I do turn in to a pink little pig!